Marcella Silva

In this episode of Just Call Jenna, Jenna sits down with agape licensed spiritual practitioner Marcella Silva for a thought-provoking conversation exploring the intersection of faith, prayer, neuroscience, and personal transformation. Together, they examine how spiritual practices may influence the brain, discussing concepts such as the Reticular Activating System (RAS), stress regulation, emotional resilience, and the ways repeated focus through prayer or intention can shape our awareness, behaviors, and outlook on life. Drawing from both science and spirituality, Marcella offers insight into how faith can help move us beyond survival mode and into a more grounded, intentional way of living.

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The discussion also dives into fear, anxiety, manifestation, ego, and the human desire to control outcomes. Jenna and Marcella explore whether prayer can quiet the nervous system, how faith may change the way we interpret life's challenges, and why many people are searching for something deeper beneath both prayer and manifestation practices. Listeners will walk away with practical tools to support their spiritual well-being, a greater understanding of the mind-body connection, and a fresh perspective on how faith and neuroscience can work together to foster healing, peace, and personal growth.

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Welcome back, everybody. Today I'm with my friend Marcella Silva. Marcella and I met through work and then I found out that she's an Agape licensed Spiritual practitioner and our conversations went way away from business into some spirituality. So Marcella, can you tell us what it means To be an agape licensed spiritual practitioner. Absolutely. And well, first of all, thank you so much, Jenna, for having me here today. It is truly a joy to share this experience with you and just to share and shed light on life in a whole different way. So Agape licensed spiritual practitioner. It's interesting actually how I kind of fell into that licensing along the way. My life has taken me on various different roads and when I was in kind of my teens to early twenties I found myself at a place where I didn't believe in God.

I'm like this idea of what religion is telling me what God is just doesn't feel right. It felt very judgmental, it felt very restrictive, and so I didn't believe in that. And At the same time, I also had this deep kind of knowing that there was so much more. And I won't get into the whole story along the way, but I really life kind of took me on a journey into love. And along the way I ended up finding myself at Agape. Uh I had a couple different friends tell me about Agape International Spiritual Center and Reverend Michael Beckwith. Who I had no idea who he was. You might be familiar with him from like The Secret, but in twenty twenty, again Third time's a charm. I was listening to a podcast and they talked about Reverend Michael.

And so right then I went and listened to one of his services and it was, oh my gosh, this man is speaking my language. He is sharing the word that is truth. And so I just found myself it was right in COVID, they opened up their classes online. So I started taking their classes for my own spiritual growth and enfoldment. After about two years, they invited me to join their licensed spiritual practitioner program, which was another two years of very intense study and just self-growth work at a level that you can't even be prepared for. I got through it all. I graduated. Now I'm officially an agape licensed spiritual practitioner. So what does that really mean? I mean, for me it is being a beneficial presence on this planet.

For myself, for others. for the world is really about having the service for love. And actually I brought our practitioner vows. I want to share those with everyone because it it kind of sheds even more light on what that means. So we the practitioners, the healing arm of the Agape International Spiritual Center, consecrate our lives to these principles. To practice the presence of God, to center ourselves through daily meditation and affirmative prayer, to behold the fullness of God in all as all, to serve God through teaching, healing, and revealing the truth. To dwell in unconditional love, peace, and thanksgiving. To dedicate ourselves to spiritual unfoldment. And to surrender to divine wisdom in joyous celebration. And so it is, and so we let it be. I love that.

So my journey, if I can share that a little bit with Please. I also sort of in my twenties and I would say probably more around sixteen, I just balked organized religion. I was raised In a very restrictive religious environment and it felt icky in my soul. Like I just knew that like while I was okay with everybody believing what they wanted, it didn't fit the way I wanted to feel. And it felt very restrictive, very like do it my way or else. And I just couldn't rationalize that a higher power would tell me how I had to believe, as long as I believed. And I think my faith got away from me, if you will, until I had to survive from death. And there was really no other way to say it than having faith in something higher than me, bigger than me.

There was absolutely no evidence that I could get better. In fact everything was stacked against me. And to have that faith that keeps you going when everything is stacked against you and the world is heavy, and to sort of keep on moving, to keep it moving. And I had to find a faith. And I call it the universe, and I'm okay with people calling it whatever they want it, but it was a belief that there's something greater than me that I was connected to that would Get me to where I go, where I was going. And it took belief, and I have no other word but faith. And as I was learning about neuroscience, which is literally just the study of the brain and the nervous system, like how I could let that release the stress results.

And they basically told me that my stroke was stress poisoning. And so how do you deal with stress? So it's a lot of just letting the brain let you calm down and relax. And so I had to have faith in something outside of myself because my human body wouldn't even perform. That's powerful. So I think faith is a big thing. And I love that that conversation we got into lunch about faith and that it doesn't need a name. It just you can believe whatever you want to believe. And when the stroke happened, I was like, my story doesn't end here. They were like, you're never gonna walk again without a walker or a cane and I was like, watch me. But I was aware that everything everybody was saying that I had seen and felt, I like and call it as an experience, because human-wise you can't explain it.

But I was aware that I was back for a reason, that if it was my time, I would have been gone. And so I was aware that I couldn't listen to any of them. that same divine thing was like I needed all of them away. I went through my healing and I barely talked to anyone. I just knew nobody could understand and Somehow I was aware that I didn't want anybody else's voice, opinions, energies to distract that. I wanted to focus on my connection to where I was going. And it did. It took a lot of faith. It took a belief of something outside of me. It took complete surrender. It took blocking everything scientific. Everything that I had been taught my whole life, like scientific method-wise.

I had no proof. I just knew deep inside my soul in my I don't know karma, energy, bodies or whatever. I just knew deep inside of me I was back for a reason and there is no way that I or this higher power would have chosen for me to come back and suffer any more than I had. So I think there's a little bit of personal action that comes in it. Oh, a hundred percent. It's it's that power working through you and as you. And Again, I think it's not falling into, oh, woe was me. Poor me. I'm a victim of a circumstance. Oh yeah, we all have the friend that does that. We all do. So many people do. And unfortunately it's very prevalent in today's society.

But you know, Jenna, as you were talking You mentioned it's just extreme stress put you into this life event. And I've seen this story repeated with many, many people. They've pushed themselves so hard, they've ignored themselves so much. Then some big issue shows up. So we're gonna slow you down, whether you like it or not. You're stopping right here. Yeah, I got stopped dead in my tracks. Almost literally dead in your tracks.

Yeah, right. So then it's now what. And are you gonna choose to rise above it? Are you gonna choose to allow this to lift you up or bring you down? Yeah, that personal choice. So how do you push that into the idea of fate?

Like if when you're choosing, is it Is it faith? Is it prayer? What in your view is that like when you're making the choice to not be a victim and move in a different direction? Yeah. Big question. That's a yeah, that is a big question. And you know, it's something that I constantly have to cultivate within myself. Every day, prayer, meditation, and for me, prayer isn't wishing for some divine being outside of me to hand me blessings in a miracle. It's Yeah, I'd like an easy butt too, by the way. Right. It's truly being the embodiment and allowing spirit to work in me and through me and trusting with absolute unconditional confidence that this strength, this power, this love, this universal intelligence is right where I am and it wants the highest and greatest good for me.

And it makes me in its image and likeness. Not meaning that my physical body looks like some deity, but that I am the full embodiment of spiritual qualities like love and peace and joy and freedom. These are my divine inheritance. That's your divine inheritance. That's the divine inheritance of all of us. And really accepting that oneness with truth with spirit with the divine mind of God, the divine universal intelligence, whatever you want to call it, right? And stepping into the field of love. So again, I'm am I going to choose to because that's our free will. It's our choice. I agree with that. Am I going to choose to believe in fear and these circumstances out of me and the beliefs of other people, which might not even be true with a capital T as in the quality of God truth.

Or am I gonna let all that go and surrender?

That's one of the most powerful actions I have personally done in my life. that you mentioned a few different times. It's just like let it all go. Letting go of my preconceived notions, letting go of my beliefs that have come from my past. From other people, from society, from just thousands of years of race consciousness, meaning the human idea of quote unquote right and wrong and judgments and I call those all judgments. Exactly. Like how many times are the voices in my head, not even others? Like when we talk about prayer, I don't know if I want to call it prayer or manifestation, but Just knowing that when I was healing, I couldn't let anybody else's energetic vibes come into there.

I was so focused on my connection to me being a healed version of myself against all odds. So I don't know if that's prayer or manifestation. I don't think on a human level we're going to be able to understand that, but it is, it is a belief in something outside of all evidence. And that to me is faith. Like there is no evidence backing me up. I don't know if it's delusion or crazy prayer manifestation, whatever it is. I just was aware that my story doesn't end here. And for me to get there, I need to get everybody else out of my way and just move in that direction.

May truth be revealed and love prevail. Yeah. I can think of I was raised in a Catholic church and they were always like the Lord's Prayer, right? Our Father who out in heaven, but it was Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. It wasn't, oh please do this. It was your will be done. And somehow that was in my head Healing. Like that was the religious background I had was like it's not a matter of asking. It's a matter of believing it will be so. Yes. And allowing it. Being with it. Yeah. Sitting with things that are heavy when you have no evidence. To me, that's faith. You're believing in something that you have absolutely no good reason. Kind of like starting a podcast when you don't know why.

I have absolute belief that this is gonna help people. I have no evidence to back that up. I had no real good reason why other than this is the path I'm being called to walk for whatever it is. So trusting and that's faith. That's faith. And you're doing it. Yeah. On the human realm of things, you're allowing God's will to be done. Yeah, so that's kind of a lot of what's happening, but I think that's faith and I you know to me prayer is like meditation, mindfulness. It's connecting with it and I studied a lot about Buddhism stuff and there's the idea of the observer effect is very prevalent in Buddhism and it's just Sitting with your thoughts and just observing them, not passing judgment on them, letting them be. It's so I think that's faith and prayer, just believing, okay, and just that belief of letting that energy work through me and push me just a little bit further. So that was a big one for me.

Yeah, you're a living embodiment of prayer. So as you were saying in your healing journey, you really didn't want to I guess, for lack of a better word, be polluted by the beliefs of people outside of your situation who really didn't understand the process that you were going through. And so you were holding space for yourself in truth. And me as an agape licensed spiritual practitioner, that's what I'm here to do on this planet or not only myself but other people hold them in that space of truth and knowingness of their absolute complete wholeness and oneness regardless of the situation there's the situation outside of me but that's not the truth that's the illusion. The truth is you are spirit. You are perfect, whole, and complete. You have the strength of God in you. Period, the end. And I'm seeing that for you.

And that's where, you know, great healers. Great avatars. Okay. Divine beings like Jesus and Buddha and Kwan Yin and Ama. I mean there's Many that have walked this earth that seemingly do miracles, and it's because they stand in that oneness. I love that. Standing in the one that's like I think a lot about uh there's a lyric in a song that's like I get my light right from the source and I think about that like the sun. I mean I'm a Leo, so sun is big to me, right? I know you know that one. You're a Leo too, right? Yeah. But I think about the sun being like the light and I think about it in a way of like light of the universe. It gives life. It makes plants grow. It makes Food nourishing, right? We all kind of need that light.

So I think a lot about like getting light from the source. And that was a big thing for me when I was healing is just my light is coming directly from all that is created. And that light to shine needs to, like in your words. For lack of a better word, bullet, I need to get anything that dims my light out of the way because I am fighting like hell to make this light shine right now. And that was Such a weird revelation but so freeing at the same time. That gave me chills. I love that. So what has that experience taught you about your heart? That I was ignoring myself. I was not giving myself love.

So my first mission was to give myself the same kind of love I would give my children or my mother or my friends that I deserve that same love and it was my job to give it to myself and stop expecting external factors to do it.

And that was such a hard lesson. But you know, face death and you'll get that one real quick. That's powerful. Loving yourself. Super hard to do. I had to heal from so much. I mean it was at first they gave me weekly therapy to deal with It's the trauma of what it did physically and you know if you've ever heard of like people whose hearts are affected. Depression is a very normal thing that people feel after heart attacks, heart surgeries, etc. Depression is a very well-known thing to coincide with that. So they gave me therapy to heal from the stress of it. And at first I was like, why am I doing this? I don't want to be in therapy. But after about six months, I had this great therapist. I'm on my second one now, but my first. She kind of forced me to look at the ugly parts of myself as we would call them, or those hard things.

And I just kind of thought all these things I had gone through in my human journey, these lessons that I was supposed to learn, I was sort of just stuffing them all down and letting them determine my work. I was only worthy if I was not showing the signs of them versus actually processing those feelings and dealing with them. So another, you know, silver lining to it was just Going through that dark night of the soul or the shadow work, whatever we want to call it, but healing from those things. And that was real self-love and self-care. In a way that we don't talk about, I think, in And congratulations to you for going through that, for choosing to go to take it on. Yeah, it was a it was some work. It is work. It is. The path of spirituality, the path of truth, the path of love is work. Mm-hmm.

There's no ifs, ands, or buts about it. And taking that on, I mean, it just shows the strength of character that you have. And a hundred percent for for me, I see it as All those things right that you said that you kept stuffing down. Situations, circumstances happen throughout our life. And in unless we choose to resolve them and feel them and allow them to flow through us and out of us. We stuff them down, stuff them down, stuff them down. And to me it's like sticking a thorn in my heart for each situation until my heart is so filled with thorns and hurt that it literally something bad happens. Yeah, I agree with that. I think it's all about choices. For me one of my favorites is what you're not changing, you're choosing. So if you don't like your circumstances, you can make changes.

And I think we a lot of times those triggers or what you're describing as thorns, all those wounds, they limit us or make us take Steps or fears, I think we all react out of fear, and so the courage to go through those journeys and make those changes is a big one. And I think our egos get in the way. Our societal pressure is like I didn't realize I was a perfectionist until I had to go through this and I was a real perfectionist. Like I never felt good enough unless it was perfect. And trying to achieve perfection at everything is exhausting. The perfect will take you out. It almost did. Like I tried to be the perfect mom, the perfect provider. I had to be both mom and dad. I'm the perfect worker, the perfect this, the perfect that. And I mean I'm good at a lot of things and it took me a long time to realize that Just because I can doesn't mean that I should.

And I think the realization came for me in healing when it was, okay, if the cause of my Stroke is really stress poisoning, the perfect storm. But I literally, there was a big portion of this I could control. And how do you live a life without stress? So not just, hey, by the way, can you heal, but can you create a whole new life for yourself. Can you live completely different? And, you know, yes, diet, exercise, all those things are important, but can you really get your soul at peace? Because that took a lot of faith. And like How do I build a life that I want to live? And that's a large portion of what this podcast is for is so stress less and live more is like, okay. Let that stuff go. Yes, it takes a little faith, but life should be enjoyable.

And I think it wasn't for me. I was so busy hoping to be happy. And there were fleeting moments, but now I'm actually happy in my soul and I'm joyful in my soul. And I didn't even really know that that was possible. I was sort of chasing this thing. And then I had faith that I could get better and create this life I want. And now that I'm living it, I love it. I just I wish it didn't have to be so hard for me to get here, that's all. Yes. Well and you've mentioned the word stress a few times. And I mean let's look at where does stress come from. Stress is coming from The idea that we need to be perfect. The idea that we need to control things, outcomes, situations, circumstances. Good luck with that. It comes from our past, so belief in our past, being stuck in our mind about our past, or the idea of the future.

How what do I want this future to look like and be like and control right now so that it looks like this. You said a word in there that was big to me and that's the belief. Like I call it limiting beliefs all the time, but they are people, places, and things that have happened to us in somewhere. In our conscious or subconscious, we've taken these on, and these are these beliefs, and so we look for evidence to back up these beliefs that we have are to prove ourselves right. And sometimes to me, faith is like I don't have anything more than a belief. I have no evidence To back up this belief, like me and my healing journey, I had absolutely no good scientific reason why I believed that the life I'm living now was even possible. At that time I couldn't even shower by myself. I needed somebody to help me get on and off the toilet. Like there was no belief That I could be sitting here right now talking to you, but that's some of what faith is, like releasing those limiting beliefs and going, I am greater than this.

And that was just belief where I guess belief is part of faith to me. And I yeah, I think yeah, it's a part of faith, but faith is so much more. I agree with that. The belief for me is that's my human mind. Yeah. Also known as the ego mind. That identifies with this body and protecting this body rather than identifying with the spirit that I am and having faith. To me is that I am spirit. I am so much more than this body. And as spirit, I am one with all of the bodies. All of the things. Yeah. All of the universe. And back to the idea of stress, if I'm present. If I'm breathing, just focusing on my breath, right? This whole thing doesn't have to be hard. It's only hard if we make it hard. Oh, and we are good at doing it. And we're very good at doing it. We're very good at that. It's Being present in this present moment, there's only one moment here.

I love that. I like to think of it for me like when you're talking about being one with everything and the body and the ego. I know everybody wants like, or I should say more people say the soul is in the body. I think of it like my body being in my soul. My body is just a physical manifestation of what my sort of spirit or soul brought in. This energetic body houses my body and my ego gets stuck as the physical matter, but letting go of letting that sort of universal mind that I'm connected to breathe and feel. And I remember in healing, one of the therapists had told me that You're not healing so that you can take on more trauma. You're healing so that you can actually experience joy and peace. And I was like, wait, what? What is that? And now I understand, but then I didn't. Congratulations. Thank you. I'm getting to that point because yeah, that it that that's just wanting to recognize the huge dark night of the soul that you went through and walked through and came out on the other end, not destroyed, but risen above to your highest and greatest self.

And that's for me one of my most powerful practices is forgiveness. Oh so hard to do. That one, that's a big one. And it says, you know, in the Bible, forgive 70 times seven. What does that mean for me? Okay, there's seven days a week. I'm forgiving 70 times a day. And what does that mean? That means letting go of fear, letting go of the beliefs, letting go that I'm some sort of victim and choosing love. And choosing love and choosing love and compassion. I found it easier to forgive other people. I found it harder to forgive myself. And that realization was so hard and when I started sort of forgiving myself for being human, making mistakes, giving myself grace, however you want to do it. I just went like my goal is more often than not. I don't have to be perfect, but if more often than not I'm doing what's aligned with me, it's okay that I have an off day. It's just Not okay if I keep making the same mistake, but forgiveness for me and forgiving myself for mistreating myself, that was one of the most emotional journeys I went on.

Yes. I think there's again that's some accountability. Like it's our own personal responsibility to learn our lessons and face what's given to us. And I think it's it's hard, but I think forgiveness is a big one. And I think uh everything starts with awareness to me. Awareness, just your breath. Exhale and then inhale. Yeah. I now Damn, like I did a whole thing when I was first getting better that was um on pranayama, which is just about like yoga breathing or somatic breathing. And I wasn't even aware until I went through that practice of how I had been like shallow breathing for so much of my life. It's like never exhaling, never letting go. And so just learning the simple practice of breathe in for four, out for six. How different that started making things. And then that sort of pause when something would come up. Instead of reacting, just Breathe in and exhale and then if I still felt the way after exhaling, which nine times out of ten I did not, then I could do something about it.

that it became with emotional regulation and all that and everything started with there, but it wasn't until I was aware that just taking a breath meant everything. That pause. Yeah. Allowing life to breathe you. Yeah. Right? The life that is back of all things. Life which is All of it. Uh yeah, you know, I can put life right in there with the term of God. Right. Yeah. It's all life. And one of my favorite If if things get heavy in life, it's just breathe and peace be still. Breathe, peace, be still. I agree with that. I love peace. Like I think about even a lot of religions, their things are peace, right? Like I grew up in the Catholic Church and everything was Peace be with you and also with you. I think that's the vibration or currency that we all want to be at. Just peace. You don't need to rock the boat. I think of life Like, can I keep my life like a glassy lake and not rock my boat? Can it just be a pristine lake?

Life is gonna bring enough rapids and ripples. I don't need to help it along. I had to go back in a lot of places and remind myself, if I knew then what I know now, but I only knew what I knew then. So I had to go back and forgive the child in me, the teenager in me, the me that was having a stroke. I had to forgive all those parts of myself and just realize I didn't have the awareness that I have now. Now me now would make different choices, but me now has that knowledge because of the choices I made. Yeah. And that's where, you know, I think I in the very beginning when you asked about being licensed spiritual practitioner being the beneficial presence on this planet. So as I'm out and about in the world, it's being love, it's seeing through the eyes of God, it's seeing through the eyes of love, it's it's being one with the mind of love and light. And so That energy, people can feel it. They might not know what it is, something's, you know, unique or different, but they feel it.

Yeah. And it it gives them peace. It gives them love, even just being kind to somebody, giving a kind word, you know, forgiving. One of my favorite forgiveness practices is the Ho'oponopono prayer. Yeah, I love that one. Yeah, Sorry please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.

Let me ask you a question if as coming from all that we've said if somebody is in the heaviest place of their life today what is the first piece of advice you would give them?

Like we said, breathe. Just breathe. Turn within and breathe. And really focus on that breath. And even repeating a mantra, like the Ho'opono prayer.

And it doesn't have to be the whole thing. It just Thank you. I love you. Thank you. I love you. And just focusing on that to start bringing yourself into the present moment and out of the mental ruminations that are keeping you stuck in this darkness. Because that's our ego. It wants to control us and keep us quote unquote safe in this little box that is not really supporting our soul's growth.

And so it's it it can be as simple as just Stop and breathe and speak a word. Peace, love, freedom, light, whatever is calling to you, God, Jesus, whatever that is, that brings you that sense of just peace and begin to bring the mind into the heart. Yeah I love that my first one is Like when people ask me, what is my number one advice if you are in the heaviest place that you've been in and life is just weighing you down? My first is just Breathe in and breathe out and say, I'm safe, I'm at peace. That's as simple as it is. Like I'm safe, I'm at peace. And I've had people where take they can do it in two breaths, and I've had people in ten, but Just that breath of like I'm safe, I'm at peace, it it calms your nervous system and you go from fight or flight to like I can process. And I think you have to process.

And that's the thing too, process, right? Like feel the feelings and always remember to love yourself. First and for Foremost, love yourself and if you don't know how just begin. Yeah. Look in the mirror. Look in your eyes and say I love you. And say it over and over and do it over and over again until it begins to feel like the truth. I agree with that. Praise and love yourself. Like that is the first steps and it's not fake. It's just like just breathe and love yourself.

And if you love yourself, you can forgive yourself. We would forgive our family members. We would forgive our children. We forgive all kinds of people. Why shouldn't we do the same for ourselves? I love lots of people, but I found it harder to love myself.

I think there was that little teeny child inside of me that needed somebody to show up a certain way. And after what I went through, I came back as the person that was exactly what that child needed. And I've found a way to love myself and experience it. And I don't have to be perfect. For the first time in my adult life, I'm not trying to be perfect. And what is perfect anyways? Usually what somebody else wants. And I find perfection exhausting. It's some belief system taught to us, right? And it was by whatever religion, society, marketing, whatever. Yeah, I agree. It nowadays I see it as like I am perfection just because I exist. Yeah. You're perfect. If I wasn't worthy, I wouldn't have been said both by myself or whatever higher power is out there. If I wasn't worthy and I wasn't supposed to be here, there was a grand opportunity to take me out and that didn't happen.

So I have a purpose. And I'm worthy just by existing. Yeah. See yourself as God sees you.

Right? Just exhale. Just let it go and exhale. And I think that's one of the hardest things for us to do as humans, but just let it go. Yeah, and keep exhaling. I invite everyone who's listening to continue to exhale and exhale and exhale and exhale and exhale and exhale and exhale. Exhale, exhale, exhale. I agree with that.

Awesome. Well, Marcella, thanks so much for being here. I really appreciate it. As my standard line, remember, karma is real, energy is contagious. Check your vibes. Let it be peace. Peace and blessings to everyone. It has been my absolute joy to be here with you, Jenna. It is just with great gratitude that I have you in my life. I know it was divine right connection that brought us together. I feel the same. I remember the first time we met, it was like a business meeting. I just walked right up to you and hugged you. I was like, I feel like we're supposed to hug. Out of nowhere. Awesome. Well, thank you so much, and thanks everyone for listening. Thank you, everyone. Peace and blessings.