Fear Is A Signal, Not A Weakness

In this episode of Just Call Jenna, Jenna Williams explores the powerful idea that fear is not a weakness—it’s a signal from the brain that you’re stepping into unfamiliar territory. Drawing from neuroscience and personal experience, she explains how the brain is wired for survival, often reacting to emotional risks such as setting boundaries, starting a business, speaking up, or making life changes the same way it would respond to physical danger. Jenna breaks down how fear triggers the body's stress response and why so many people mistakenly interpret those feelings as a sign to stop rather than a sign of growth.

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The episode also highlights the science of neuroplasticity and how confidence is built through repeated acts of courage, not by eliminating fear. Jenna shares practical strategies to retrain the nervous system, including movement, grounding exercises, and breathwork that help regulate fear and reduce anxiety. Through actionable insights and encouragement, she reminds listeners that resilience is not the absence of fear—it’s the ability to move forward despite it. Fear may always have a voice, but it doesn’t have to be the one leading your life.

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Welcome back. Today I'm going to talk about fear as a signal and not as a weakness. So I think many of us are debilitated by fear. It controls a lot of our life. It's one of the most misunderstood experiences in the brain. But what I want to give you is just an explanation of how fear works, how to use it as not a weakness, but really is your superpower. There's some real life techniques in here. There's some real understanding, but I think fear is what holds us back from keeping it moving most of the time.

Fear keeps us stuck. I think the strongest, most resilient of us, we're not fearless. We just fear less or know how to work with fear versus letting it keep us stuck. So I want you to learn about all that today and just kind of understand. So again, fear is not a weakness. It's really a superpower when it's used correctly.

It's one of the most misunderstood experiences in the brain. It only means that the brain detected uncertainty, and your brain interprets uncertainty as danger. So, understanding that a fear response is biological, you're going to have it anytime something feels uncertain. The brain is a prediction machine. It predicts to keep you safe. Its job is safety first, comfort next. So it's designed for survival. It doesn't know the difference between a physical danger and an emotional risk. It just knows, hey, I'm uncertain. I don't know what to do with this. I can't predict the outcome. Danger. Stress response. So fear is your brain detecting a uncertainty, some kind of a risk, whatever that risk is, physical risk, emotional risk. Anything that is not comfort. It is designed for survival. It is going to activate a fear and stress response.

Fear is one of the biggest stress responses there is. Most stress is caused from fear. Fear that something is uncertain. It's a risk. Fear of risk. Your nervous system doesn't know if you're speaking up in a meeting, leaving a toxic situation, starting a business, setting a boundary, saying no, putting your needs first, taking a nap, or fighting a bear. It doesn't know the difference. It just sends a biological stress response. So not everything is a life or death experience, but your brain is going to react the same. And of course there's varying degrees, but your brain doesn't know the difference. So part of being resilient or letting fear not be a weakness is understanding the varying degrees.

So let's talk about what a fear response feels like. Your heart's gonna race, your stomach's gonna tighten, you might procrastinate, you might avoid, you might overthink. It's a fight, flight, or freeze response. The dangerous part is that you interpret those as proof that you shouldn't move forward. You interpret that as I should stay stuck. That is your default response way back in the unaware places in your brain. It's not a weakness, it's actually biology that your body is responding that way. And you can learn to listen to it. You can learn to interpret it and understand what it's telling you. And it starts with: I feel uncomfortable. I'm noticing this response. This is fear. And so when you start labeling fear as what it is, it doesn't mean you're weak. It just means that you're experiencing fear. So don't call yourself weak because you're afraid of something. Just label it as fear. I'm afraid of that and that's okay. It's normal to be afraid of it.

Neuroscience actually shows us that fear is often a sign that your brain is entering unfamiliar territory. Biologically, it just means that your brain is noticing it's an unfamiliar territory.

That doesn't mean it's unsafe territory. You are interpreting it as unsafe because it's unfamiliar and your brain is a prediction machine. That is just biology. So just label it. I'm afraid. So what does that look like? And there's a couple of systems in the brain that work for that. So first is your amygdala. That's like your alarm system in the brain. When you feel fear it starts asking and scanning am I safe how do I keep myself safe that's your alarm system it is designed for survival it is doing its job to ask Am I safe?

Your brain loves prediction because it conserves energy. Your brain takes up 20% of your physical energy. Just your thoughts alone take 20% of your energy. Your body gets what's left over. So your brain wants to predict things because it conserves energy. That's a biological response. And it keeps you alive. So if it can conserve energy and keep you alive, it's doing exactly what it's supposed to do. It predicting that is how your brain works. How do I know this? Because after I healed from the stroke, I got a neuroscience certification. So I'm actually certified in it. So not only am I lived experience, but I'm also book experience and trains. But that's understanding the brain is part of understanding that fear keeps you stuck.

Your brain is trainable. It's neuroplasticity. It's your ability to rewire and make new connections.

You can condition your brain to tolerate a little discomfort. I certainly did. Believe me, healing from a stroke was not comfortable. I explained it to a friend the other day that it's like my life had a four-way intersection and every day I just kept driving through, stop at the stop sign, go forward, and then one day I show up and there's a 20-foot tree, right in the middle of the intersection. I can still get to the other side, but my straight through now became a roundabout? That's how neuroplasticity works. You learn to tolerate a little discomfort and you rewire it. And now, almost three years after the stroke. I don't have to work as hard as I did in the beginning because I trained it over and over and over again. I repeated until I got it, until my brain made it automatic. Your brain is a prediction machine. That's biology. So the more you repeat something, habits, etc. the more you're going to automate that program, if you will. But your brain is absolutely trainable. It is not through massive leaps. It's actually through repeated things.

So if you walk the same path seven days in a row you're gonna be more comfortable with that than if one day you walk that path without repeating the repetition is how your brain is going to learn. It's small acts of courage repeated that's neuroplastis that's how you learn to tolerate the fear or the discomfort. Because fear is really just discomfort. We gave it a name fear, but it's just discomfort. It's understanding that your brain is just in an unfamiliar territory. It doesn't know how to automate that because you haven't repeated it in that. So if you learn to understand that, you learn to accept it. Oh, I'm feeling afraid. I'm feeling uncertain. I don't have enough evidence. It's kind of like approaching everything as a beginner, right? You don't know how to do it yet. Many times when you start something, you don't even know what you don't know until you've done it a few times and you go, oh, now I don't know what now I know what I don't know. And I have to learn it. Repetition.

Is that small acts of courage repeated? That's how you train your brain. You say, I survived this. I can handle this. This is uncomfortable, but that doesn't make it dangerous. This is not life or death. It's just uncomfortable. I'm not going to die. I do or don't something. Each time that you do that, you actually weaken the association that happens between fear and avoidance. Avoidance can be overthinking. You know, again, there's responses that we all have to fear. Fight, flight or freeze. And I'm sure you can look at all the people in your life and know who responds which way. But those small acts of courage will let you work with fear but this is how confidence is built it's not by never feeling fear i don't think you can be human and not feel fear but it's learning that Fear doesn't have to control you.

You don't have to give in to it. You have control of you, repeating those small acts of courage to the place of where you notice, huh? This is uncertain. I'm afraid of this. I don't have a way for my brain to predict what's gonna happen. I can't predict the outcome. We all need to know how many times do you see something out there where they promise you results and you try to figure out how do I know I'm gonna get the result? That is a type of fear right. Oh while i'm in this meeting and i have a really important thought to say how is everybody else gonna perceive me not speaking up is usually a reaction to fear. Oh, I got that thing in the mail that I need to respond to. Being an adult is no fun sometimes, but as an adult there are responsibilities that we have to do. But you tend to avoid them in many cases because you can't predict what's going to happen if you do. And so that feeling of unknown keeps you stuck. But again, you're not fearless. You just fear less. And you do that by small acts of courage repeated over and over again.

You train your nervous system to accept that you're afraid of something and naming it sort of takes the danger off of that unknown monster. Oh I'm afraid I can label it. Now your brain can process this is how I respond to fear. And you train that by these small acts of courage. Sometimes it's as simple as I don't want to get out of bed today, but you move yourself into the shower. Just congratulate yourself. I really didn't want to get up. I wanted to give up today. But I got in the shower. Good job. That's a small act of courage. Your brain, because of the unknown, of what you wanted to avoid that day, didn't want you to move forward. Congratulations. You kept it moving by repeating acts of courage. Even if it's as small as just getting in the shower, getting in the car and leaving the house. There are plenty of days I get up where I'm like, you know, I'd love to just sit here in my bed all day long. and do nothing. But sometimes you have to be responsible to get up and go.

But understanding that it's fear, I don't, my brain can't predict what's gonna happen. And because of that, it makes me want to not move forward. But if I label it and I know what it is and I keep moving forward, then I can tell myself, this is just fear, right? This is uncomfortable. I'm not going to die if I get up and go where I need to go. This is not life or death. It's just uncomfortable. I'm afraid because I can't predict what's going to happen. A lot of us come up with expectations or stories in our head to try to predict that to get us moving, but just accepting that I don't know the answer and I'm willing to get up and move forward Anyway, that's real courage. That's actually how you fear less. But this is how confidence is built, not by never feeling fear, but learning that fear doesn't have to control you. You choose.

Confidence is not the absence of fear. It is evidence that's stored in your nervous system. If fear has been keeping you stuck, stop waiting for fear to disappear before you move. You're not gonna build confidence.

For example, if I had waited for my fear of what my life was going to look like after a stroke to disappear, I would still be stuck in hospital care. I would not be off a walker in a wheelchair. I would have stayed stuck with fear, but I built my confidence. With every step. Many of you have heard me say driveway by driveway. Today I went three driveways, so tomorrow I'm confident I can go four. I did push myself a little bit, but if I had waited for my fear to disappear to keep it moving, I'd be stuck. The big picture was overwhelming to me. The idea when I was on a walker that I was going to drive a car, be able to do the Pilates, walk my dog, all those things, there is no way I could do it at the time. But if I had waited for fear to disappear before I made a movement, I'd be stuck.

I give you that because that's fear is a signal. Naming it. And building confidence by over and over repeating patterns that will get you out of it. That's the big one. Movement is actually part of retraining your brain. So start smaller than your ego wants. But bigger than your fear prefers. Your fear prefers that you stay right here and do nothing. That's how fear works. But start with something smaller than your ego wants. Your ego wants you to go to the extreme. It wants you on a scale of one to ten to get to ten. Your ego wants you to be at one. How can you get to three, four, or five? That's reasonable movement, notable movement in the right direction, but without having to take on the world.

What might that look like? Send the email. Don't overthink it. What if, what if, what if. Send the email. Have the conversation. Talk to somebody. Explain your situation. Apply for the job. Take the walk. Say no. Say yes. Those are some examples. They don't have to be life or death or dramatic. Kind of like Nike, just do it. Just do the small thing. Again, bigger than your fear wants you to stay stuck at, and smaller than your ego wants. Your ego wants you to be perfection and winning at all times. Most of life is kind of in the mundane. I mean, sure, there's great moments, but the majority is the small daily repeated tasks.

So just say, okay, I'm afraid that somebody might not like this, but I'm gonna send the email. I'm gonna have the conversation. I'm gonna speak up. Oh, this is my dream job. I'm afraid they're gonna reject me. Apply for it. Okay. I'm physically hurt today. You know, I don't have any energy. Take the walk. I don't want to do that, but I feel this obligation to that person. Just say no. Okay. I really want to do that thing but I'm afraid to try it. Just say yes. Those are ways that you're going to build. You're going to understand. I'm afraid of the outcome. I can't predict the outcome. That's essentially what fear is. It's not being able to predict the outcome. It's not knowing the answer. Speaking up anyway, moving forward anyway, making movement even though you can't predict the outcome. Your brain is going to fear that you can't predict the outcome. Your ego is absolutely gonna get in the way of that, but just take the small measured step. But those are some examples of what I mean, but Just start.

Movement is what retrains your brain. You need to start smaller than your ego wants, but bigger than your fear wants. Somewhere in the middle. You gotta find that balance and just slow steps every time because every courageous action will send a message to your nervous system.

You're safe enough to grow. Or in the Gen X style. But did you die? That's one of my favorites. I think I've said that my whole life. But did you die? I even have a shirt that says, but did you die? So I think understanding that is that fear exists, but it doesn't mean you're gonna die. You just take those small, courageous steps. And you repeat, repeat, repeat. You sort of rinse and repeat all the time. And when you do that, you become courageous so that you're not fearless, you just fear less.

Eventually your brain will stop sounding the alarm in your amygdala of everything that terrifies you, of even the very thing that terrified you, because you're retraining it. This is how transformation actually happens neurologically. It's not overnight, but through repetition, choice by choice, thought by thought.

Step by step. I remember when I had a mentor in banking that was helping me grow up in banking and I didn't know what I was doing. And one of his favorite things to tell me was girl baby steps. Just baby steps. And that was so hard for me because I thought everything on a scale of 1 to 10 had to be a 13. And when I learned baby steps, that was really important. So thanks, buddy, for that one. You know who you are. But I think that's the repetition. It happens neurologically, choice by choice, thought by thought, step by step. And baby steps is gonna get you there. You don't have to take on the world. You don't have to make it harder on yourself. If you keep it moving in the right direction, the gap will be filled.

Consistency is going to be an outlier a hundred percent of the time those who are consistent at something will be an outlier. Now an outlier may gain more ground in a short amount of time, totally possible, and that happens. But those who consistently move in the right direction, it doesn't matter what facet of life you're applying it to. Work, play, business relationships. If you consistently do something over time, you will win 100% of the time, you will get to the destination. So think about that repetition, but that's part of courage. It's just I'm going to take the baby steps and not try to close the gap today. I don't need to close the gap because fear will always speak up. But you can train yourself to not let it lead. That's it. Just don't let fear lead.

Get out of survival mode. Get your nervous system relaxed enough to let life happen. Because fear is a signal that you are out of alignment.

You're uncertain. It's a signal from your brain that it can't predict what comes next. It can't do what it wants to do because that's how resilience gets formed. It's not the absence of fear, but it's the ability to move through it. The ability to take those baby steps consistently because your brain is constantly adapting to what you think, feel, and practice. And so if you feel fear and you say, okay, I'm afraid, but I'm gonna take a step forward anyway. Okay, don't think that just because you're taking a step that you need to run the whole mile. You're just taking a step and every step will 100% of the time get you through the mile. But trying to take on the whole mile is only going to reinforce fear. Again, your brain can't predict how to get to the end. But with each step, your confidence grows and you're going to get to the end.

So your brain is constantly adapting to what you think, feel, and practice. Fear will always speak up. Your brain will always tell you, this is uncertain, and your brain will always fire, I don't know if I'm safe. But if you train your nervous system to be safe by constantly taking steps and just saying, okay, I feel fear and I'm gonna do it anyway, I'm the kind of person who does it anyway. Before you know it, you will be a courageous and resilient person. But those are repeated steps. Steps, even if you don't have it now, you will. So part of that constantly adapting and courageous steps is that I want you to understand. Fear is one of the fastest survival systems in the brain. It is going to activate before you can do anything. Before your conscious mind even understands what's happening, your nervous system has already scanned for danger. And the reticular activating system, the RAS, has started scanning for evidence for your brain to be right. Remember, it's a prediction machine.

But this is why fear can make even smart people seem irrational. Your brain becomes less connected to your prefrontal cortex. That's where logic and decision making is. Fear changes how you think temporarily. So again, those understanding and naming fear as what it is will help you. It'll help you take that pause. The powerful part that you end up learning is your nervous system cannot always tell the difference between physical and emotional danger. You just say, I'm feeling afraid, but I'm willing to take a small step, right? That's a big part of it is what baby step can I take? What things can I repeat over and over again? But that's the powerful part. That's part of letting your nervous system relax and get out of survival mode. It brings your prefrontal cortex back online. It brings you back to logic and thinking so that you can make rational decisions.

If you react in the moment of being afraid. You can seem quite irrational. Many of us have gone, huh, why did I do that? Or you leave with that self-judgment of I wish I had of said this or done that. You probably let fear takeover. Again, you're gonna go into fear the second your brain detects uncertainty, whether that really be danger or not. And your nervous system goes huh, I'm I'm on fire. Activate activate the alarm system in your brain, the amygdala goes completely over taking with alarms. Fire, fire, the world's on fire. And your logic brain shuts down and that's why you seem irrational. But again you can say, okay, I understand that I'm feeling this way. I'm feeling fear every one of us is gonna have a different signal to fear for me I do this like I just tense up but everybody's gonna have a different physical response. Response, you might notice your feelings first. Whatever it is that helps you notice your fear, when you get to notice what that is for you, you just choose to make a small step. Forward no matter what, with I don't need to know the outcome. I'm just taking a step forward.

It's not a signal to stop. It's a signal that your nervous system needs support. Your nervous system is braced for danger. However, you want to brace, but fear makes you brace. Some of us at the brace is to come out fighting, some of us is to retreat, some of us is to just freeze. Right? Some of it it's runaway. Whatever that may be, but that's your response. And each one of us is gonna have a different reaction. But again, it's not a signal to stop. It's not a signal to allow yourself to remain stuck. It's about making small movements in the right direction, repeating them over and over again until you're not letting fear take over for you.

So let me tell you about some really important tools that I use for clients that I'm coaching. One of my favorites is the longer exhale. Just breathe in for four seconds and breathe out for six. The longer exhale actually tells your brain we are safe enough to slow down. You kind of need to do that before you try to find those little small steps forward. Just the breathe in for four, out for six. That's really important and actually calms your nervous system to allow you to feel safe and slow down. Grounding brings the brain back into the present. Memory and sensory awareness are ways to do that. So put your feet in the grass. Sit down and imagine a big cord coming from your spine all the way into the center of the earth. Whatever it is that you gotta do. Grounding is a big one. You just instead of bracing, you're just grounded. You're more aligned. And that's a way to get out of the fear response.

Look around. Name five things you can see. I see these five things in the room? What are four things you can touch in the room? And three things you can hear. So think about that. You might say like for example, five things I can see. I can see the wall. I can see the rug, I can see the plant, I can see the painting, I can see the window. What are four things you can touch? I can touch the plant. I can touch the door. I can touch the wall. I can touch the rug. What are three things you can hear? I hear the fan going, I hear the AC going, I hear a phone buzzing. Whatever that is, but that's a 543 method. That's another way to get out of your fear response in the moment.

Movement. That's important. Fear creates energy in the body, almost like a static electricity buildup. If that energy stays trapped, your anxiety is gonna grow. You can shake your hands. Roll your shoulders, stretch out. These are all ways of movement to again allow you to just move. Fear may be automatic, but staying stuck doesn't have to be. So again, those small baby steps that you can repeat. If all you can do is remember to breathe in for four and out for six, great. If all you can do is ground yourself in the moment, great. If you have to look around in five, four, three, five things I can see, four things I can touch, and three things I can hear. You're activating your senses and you're bypassing that fear signal in the brain. If all you can do is move, roll your shoulders, shake your hands. That's okay. Again, fear is going to try to keep you stuck. You don't have to let it. Movement is one of the most important ways to let that energy flow. And that's part of what you need to do.

So thanks for joining me today. As you've learned, fear may be automatic, but staying stuck doesn't have to be. Karma's real, energy is contagious. Check your vibes.